underemployment

The internet! Where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives!

Nov 18, 2009 4:54pm

“[T]hey’ve taken from what I’ve said an assumption that I’m gay, and in the halls and cafeteria I’ve been repeatedly called a gaywad.”

Kids are such JERKS (as is this douchey interviewer, so smirkful and undeserving of thanks). Will Phillips is WONDERFUL. It’s hard out there for a serious, tiny adult.

(via Tiger Beatdown)
Nov 18, 2009 4:18pm

boldtype, it's great

Because of book links. Such as: a brief list of books you can read online; a list of Best Books for Young Ladies; and some scans from an Edward Gorey-illustrated book titled The Recently Deflowered Girl, which seems kind of super-racist? but funny!

All right, three links, two to lists. But it’s better than a list of instructions on turning your urine into “an ideal hydroponic solution for plants!” [emphasis the author’s].

Nov 18, 2009 4:01pm
sexpigeon: How To Spin a Hamburger on Your Finger and Impress Everyone Even the Teacher. This looks like Quentin Blake drew it! Especially around the fingers.

sexpigeon:

How To Spin a Hamburger on Your Finger and Impress Everyone Even the Teacher.

This looks like Quentin Blake drew it! Especially around the fingers.
Nov 17, 2009 1:03pm
tomoatmeal: Eric Left. YOU GUYS, nominate it for best of craigslist. Because duh.

tomoatmeal:

Eric Left.

YOU GUYS, nominate it for best of craigslist. Because duh.
Nov 17, 2009 11:15am
“ Taking the place of my mother was my older sister, a fearsomely strong figure, who, if I were left for dead in a pile of leaves at the bottom of a 15-foot hole, would be the first to run to the edge and fashion a rope of her own hair to haul me out. (As a philosophical midlife exercise, you should make your own list of rescuers—that list may surprise or depress you. During my marriage I had come to feel, rightly or wrongly, that if I were left for dead in that 15-foot pit, my husband, being out of town, would not be able to come himself but, very responsibly, would hire someone to rush over.) ” -

This essay, I don’t know; it reminds me that I am not a very communicative friend. I love my friends very much, but I’m terrible about showing it, and I feel like while I would rescue lots of them, I haven’t done much to deserve them rescuing me.

How do you show your friends that you love them without going all overboard and insane about it, when you are generally inclined toward overly emotional displays and insanity?
Nov 15, 2009 11:41pm

Here's THE GAME: Grab the book nearest you • Turn to page 56 • Find the fifth sentence • Reblog these instructions & post that sentence • Don't dig for your favorite book, the coolest, the most intellectual; use the CLOSEST book.

erikonymous:

Potato I have.

They simulate masturbation and flash their breasts for crowds of onlookers.

(it’s super-depressing, but quite engaging.)

Nov 12, 2009 1:13am
“ [Ayn Rand] insist[ed] that her followers smoke because it symbolized “man’s victory over fire” and the studies showing it caused lung cancer were Communist propaganda. ” -

Two biographies of Ayn Rand, who was clearly a crazy person.

I mean, libertarianism is already The Worst because it’s so selfish, but Randies are the worst of the worst, all I don’t want to share my wealth with the lesser-off, and moreover they should worship me for being their better. So unbearably obnoxious. Being a libertarian, that is a top-5 forever dealbreaker. If you’re going to be crazy, at least be fun crazy, or interesting crazy; no one likes loud and ignorant crazy.
Nov 11, 2009 4:08pm
heatheriswatching: Design Against Crime’s anti-purse-theft Chair - Core77 If this chair were portable I’d carry one with me everywhere. Seriously. Make one that folds up like one of those tiny bicycles, it is so necessary.

heatheriswatching:

Design Against Crime’s anti-purse-theft Chair - Core77

If this chair were portable I’d carry one with me everywhere. Seriously. Make one that folds up like one of those tiny bicycles, it is so necessary.
Nov 10, 2009 11:44pm
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

La Roux - As If by Magic

I’ve been feeling all night as though I could tear out my hair, so frustrated, so angry. No specific reason why; maybe I always have “a reason” to be mad, but it isn’t focused tonight, just this rage I can’t quell. Maybe it’s time to change meds. Maybe I need a break. I’ve never been so aware of feeling quite so volatile.
Nov 10, 2009 11:53am
“

Tobias Wolff: The short story, I suppose, expects a little more thoughtfulness and engagement on the part of the reader than most readers are willing to give.

Robert Birnbaum: So in spite of the demands of time and the possibility that the short story would require less of it, you think that readers would in fact reach for the longer work because it’s easier and more convenient.

TW: Yeah, it’s more convenient. It’s easier. Also, their friends are more apt to be talking about it, really. I mean, you look on the bestseller list and the people probably when you go to the cocktail party don’t ask you if you’ve read this collection of short stories, they want to know if you’ve read Lush Life, or they want to know if you’ve read The Lovely Bones, and so it’s just more socially current, and those sorts of things tend to be self-perpetuating, there’s no question about it.

” -

Birnbaum v. Tobias Wolff

I got to edit the transcript of this interview last week, and it’s some of the most rewarding work I’ve done all year. Lucky, lucky me.
Nov 7, 2009 10:18pm
harkavagrantfeed: Hark, a Vagrant: Requests! “You’re ‘Daddy Smash’ and not another word.” YOU GUYS the funniest thing I have read in a million years. KATE BEATON! You are THE BEST. I laughed SO HARD, my parents demanded to know what caused such an uproar, and I showed them, and they laughed as well. Especially my mother; she does appreciate an Eyre sisters (Bell brothers) joke. So, not so bad.

harkavagrantfeed:

Hark, a Vagrant: Requests!

“You’re ‘Daddy Smash’ and not another word.”

YOU GUYS the funniest thing I have read in a million years. KATE BEATON! You are THE BEST.

I laughed SO HARD, my parents demanded to know what caused such an uproar, and I showed them, and they laughed as well. Especially my mother; she does appreciate an Eyre sisters (Bell brothers) joke. So, not so bad.
Nov 7, 2009 6:48pm
“ It’s a deserved sort of sad, a harsh wrist-slapping punishment for someone who stuffed her hand greedily into the cookie jar because she felt for some reason that she was owed cookies simply by virtue of her wanting cookies. Which is sort of how America works half the time, but then that other half tends to come along and satisfyingly slap people back to cold, hard, Pilgrimy reality. Tough is tough for everyone, work is work for everyone. ” -

Real Housewives of Orange County : This Is the Way the World Ends

Richard Lawson: articulator of Bravo-born fever dreams.
Nov 6, 2009 5:34pm
myparentswereawesome: Tony Submitted by Toni LOOK AT THIS. Someone’s dad was basically a Stooge, as in, the Three. So great. I want to favorite every single photo from My Parents Were Awesome, they are all so sweet and charming and funny and beautiful.

myparentswereawesome:

Tony

Submitted by Toni

LOOK AT THIS. Someone’s dad was basically a Stooge, as in, the Three. So great. I want to favorite every single photo from My Parents Were Awesome, they are all so sweet and charming and funny and beautiful.
Nov 6, 2009 12:14am
“ These kids, unbelievably, are more technologically inept than my 60-year-old colleagues whose first experience with computer data processing involved punched cards. Contrary to all logic and my minimal expectations, their near-continuous computer usage has had no effect on them. None. Many of them are absolutely fucking baffled by the concept of correctly attaching something to an email. ” -

Ed, again.

You guys, I faked my first research paper 12 years ago, in 10th grade; I stayed home “sick” from school and found all my sources online and then looked up a bunch of books on my topic and attributed my quotes to those books.

I took computer classes in 1989, 1990, when there were B drives and floppy discs actually flopped; I wrote my first proper research paper as a 12-year-old, getting 80 percent of my information from the internet.

Most days I feel like the oldest, dumbest person in the world. It is a relief and a shock to hear that kids 10 years my junior, who never knew life without computers and the internet, are worse at technology than me. I AM NOT YET OBSOLETE.

(soon perhaps, but not yet.)
Nov 5, 2009 8:22pm

bedtimechamp:

Mister Rogers “Make a Journal” iPhone/iTouch app for kids! (via PBS)

Kidlets can make a journal with Daniel Tiger!! Ohhh my heartstrings.
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